Love Hurts: Five Valentines That Were Never Exchanged

Love Hurts: Five Valentines That Were Never Exchanged

Falling in love is so hard on the knees. - Aerosmith

Xander can feel Spike’s fingers pressing hard into his scalp. The feeling reminds him of Buttons, the cat he had when he was a kid. Buttons would crawl into his lap and start flexing his paws against Xander’s thigh. Flex retract, flex retract. Only difference is Spike doesn’t have nails.

“Come on, Xander, put a little tongue into it,” Spike says.

Xander reaches up and settles his hands on Spike’s lean hips, pulling him closer. He’s been down here so long his knees are beginning to ache. He doesn’t mind normally.

“That’s it,” Spike croons. He’s swaying a little, stabbing at the back of Xander’s throat with jerky little thrusts.

Xander looks up at Spike, up past the place where they are joined, up past the hills and valleys of Spike's stomach, up past his tense jaw and waits for Spike to look down- to meet his eyes. And when Spike does, Xander pulls back.

“Flamin’ hell,” Spike says.

“Yes, I expect to be spending some time there myself,” Xander says, wiping the back of his wrist across his mouth.

“Why’d you stop?”

“I could finish,” Xander says.

Spike reaches down and gives his cock a none-too-gentle tug.

“I just thought you might want to take a moment to reconsider,” Xander says. He settles back on his haunches.

“Fucking reconsider what?” Spike says carefully.

Xander smiles.

“Being my Valentine.”

“You’ve got to be joking.”

Xander smiles and starts to stand.

“No, wait,” Spike says placing his hand on Xander’s shoulder. “I mean, Valentine’s Day isn’t really a vampire holiday, you know, we’re not really the romantic sort. Well, we weren’t until popular culture got hold of us.”

“Do you want to come or not?” Xander asks.

Spike nods.

Xander waits.

“Would you--” Spike pauses, grips his cock harder, “be my Valentine?”

Xander leans forward and swallows Spike down.

“Wanker,” Spike hisses.

When love is not madness, it is not love. - Pedro Calderon de la Barca

“I’m having a party,” Drusilla cooed to her dolls. “There will be jam and tea and cakes.” She reached out and straightened the skirt of Miss Edith’s dress. “I expect each of you to be on your best behaviour.” She leaned closer. “Especially you, Miss Edith.” She poked the doll in its porcelain belly.

A sound from somewhere in the building and Dru lifted her head.

“My company is here,” she said. “Goody.”

Two vampires arrived at the door, a struggling Willow Rosenberg between them.

“She didn’t come willingly,” one of the vamps said.

“Of course I didn’t come willingly," Willow said.

“Leave her,” Drusilla said, “but stay close.”

Willow rubbed her arms, anticipating the bruises left by the vampires’ harsh grip.

“I’m so happy you accepted my invitation,” Dru said.

“I didn’t exactly have much of a choice.”

“No, I suppose not,” Dru said. “Still, I have such a lovely tea party planned.”

Willow scanned the room looking for a means of escape. In the corner, Dru had a table set up with what looked to be the makings of a very nice lunch, china cups and saucers, a plate of- could that possibly be cucumber and watercress?- sandwiches.

Dru held out her hand. “Come sit.”

Willow took a step forward, ignoring Dru’s hand.

“Why me?” she asked.

“You have a gift,” Dru said. “I’d like you to share it with me.”

“I don’t have any gifts,” Willow said. “I’m just me.”

Dru took a seat at the pretty table and gestured for Willow to sit as well. One more quick glance around the room confirmed that there was no place for Willow to go, so she sat.

“Tea?” Dru asked.

Willow nodded although she half expected blood to come pouring from the teapot.

“Sugar? Milk?”

“Sure, all right,” Willow said.

“There,” Dru said handing Willow the prepared cup.

Willow took a cautious sip. The tea was hot and sweet.

“I don’t understand,” Willow said. “Aren’t you going to bite me?”

Drusilla smiled and for a moment she looked almost human. “You can’t have dessert before you have sandwiches.” She held out the platter.

“I saw you in a dream,” Drusilla said, placing the sandwiches back on the table. “I have very vivid dreams, my dear.”

“I was in your dream?”

Dru nodded.

“You were vibrating and energy was pouring from your fingertips. It made me dizzy,” Dru said.

“Are you sure it was me?” Willow asked.

“Quite sure,” Drusilla said offering the sandwiches again.

Willow nibbled on the corner of the crustless bread and tried to think of a way out of this mess.

“Eat up,” said Drusilla.

“Look, Drusilla, I get it that you're scary-bad and everything, but I just don’t think you want me; I mean Buffy’s my best friend and if anything happens to me- she won’t be very happy about it. She could-- stake you.”

“How lovely you are,” Drusilla said. “I think you’re even more lovely than you realize.”

“No, I’m not,” Willow replied. “Truly. I’m just an average geek.”

“I don’t think so, my dear.”


“What have you done, ducks?” Spike said.

There was Willow, pale as death, her eyes black, her mouth red as blood.

“I’ve made you a Valentine’s Day present,” Drusilla said. “She’s not much now, but give her a few years and you’ll see.”

Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so. - David Grayson

“I don’t know what to say?”

“Well, you could say that you accept.”

Cordy touched the velvety petal of one perfect red rose. She leaned closer, sniffing.

“They’re beautiful, really.”

“Look, Cordelia, you must have known all along that I had these feelings for you.”

“Honestly? No. But then, I was really, really popular at Sunnydale High. Lots of people had a thing for me.”

“Can I at least come in?”

“Yes, come in.”

Cordy stepped back and Harmony stepped in.

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” Harmony smiled through her teeth.

There's this place in me where your fingerprints still rest, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me. - Gretchen Kemp

He was slender, breakable and there was something wrong with him for thinking these thoughts, for wanting to touch him. But that didn’t stop him. He reached out and traced the faint blue veins that spread like a tree from the boy’s wrist to his fingertips.

“I’ve never—“

Those solemn blue eyes and Angel’s dick stiffened.

The thing was the boy was strong- stronger than he looked, perhaps even stronger than Angel. If he wanted to he could resist- but here he was, still and acquiescent under Angel’s hands.

Angel pressed his mouth to the boy’s bony collarbone, hipbone, still boyish cock.

“I don’t--”

The boy smelled of talc and milk. Or was that a memory? Angel couldn’t be sure. He only knew that he needed this to be whole again. And so when he took Connor into his mouth, it was communion not sacrilege.

Connor’s hips lifted from the mattress, his fingers curled into the sheet. Angel dug his fingers into Connor’s hips- held him still, sucked and licked until Connor came with a muffled moan.

While the boy was still reeling, Angel rolled him over, pulled him up by his hips and settled his tongue against the boy. That made him squirm.

“Please don’t--” Connor said.

Angel kneeled behind his son.

He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before he settled his gaze on the folded wings of Connor’s narrow shoulders.

Angel pressed forward, felt Connor’s flesh resist, then split apart, resist and then split apart until he was in all the way.

He’d never forget this moment. This day. A day for lovers and wasn’t this a sort of love?

“Shh,” Angel said.

I've fallen in love many times... always with you. -Author Unknown

“It’s a ridiculous money grab, praying on people’s isolation and misery and trying to make those who do not have significant others feel less than those who do.”

“Geesh, over-identify much?”

Wesley poked his glasses up on his nose and set his mouth in a firm line.

“I’m just saying that being alone is not--” Wes paused.


”Oh all right,” Wes said, exasperated. “I admit it.”

“Admit what?” Gunn said coming into the office where Cordelia and Wes were sitting over desks piled high with books and papers.

“Wes is bummed because he’s not getting any,” Cordy said.

“Cordelia!” Wes said.

“Well you aren’t,” Cordy said breezily.

“No, I’m not as you so delicately put it—getting any,” Wes said.

“But you could,” Gunn said. He lifted a book and glanced down at its spine. “I mean if we didn’t spend all our time fighting the forces of evil and cleaning demon goo off our clothes, we could totally score some booty.”


“He means ass,” Cordy said. “And he’s right. Our lives suck.”

“No,” Wes said. “We do good things for people in trouble.”

“Yeah, and what thanks do we get?” Cordy countered.

“Well the thanks is in the deed doing, of course,” Wes said.

“Of course,” Gunn said. “Every night I crawl into bed with my good-deed doing and we hump like wildcats.”

“Eww. I did not need that visual.”

“What visual?”

Angel appeared at the door, his hands behind his back.

“Gunn humping his good deeds,” Wes said.

Angel look puzzled for a moment and then he said: “I brought you something.”

“I hope it’s a big suitcase full of money,” Cordelia said. “I could really use some retail therapy today.”

“No, it’s not money,” Angel said pulling a huge heart-shaped box of candy from behind his back with a flourish.

“Good grief,” said Wes.

“It’s Valentine’s Day,” Angel said. “Apparently chocolate is an appropriate gift.”

“For your sweetheart,” Gunn said. “Not your employees.”

“Oh,” Angel said. “I don’t have—I mean—I couldn’t send--”

“We get it,” Cordy said reaching over to take the box. “Oh, truffles. Good choice.”

She pulled the lid off the box and pulled out a chocolate. “These are good,” she said around a mouthful. She held the box out to Wes. “Come on. It doesn’t mean you’re caving in to the establishment. They’re freakin’ truffles.”

Wes smiled a little and made his selection..

“They say chocolate is a substitute for sex,” he said as he took a bite.

“Fuck that!” Gunn said taking a candy from the box. He popped it into his mouth and closed his eyes. “Hold that thought. I may have to reconsider.”

“You guys really need to get out more,” Angel said. He was leaning against the door frame watching his friends ride out their sugar high and he couldn’t remember ever feeling so happy.


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