Three One-Times That Never Happened

Pairing: Angel/Spike
Rating: R for language, m/m slash
Spoilers: set AtS s5, no specific spoilers except one quote from 5x21 Power Play
A/N: Written for the Open On Sunday livejournal community dialogue challenge. All text must be dialogue, no description.
Summary: So if Spike and Angel were only intimate once, what could have happened?

SPIKE: Guess I don't have to worry about that, 'cause Angel and me have never been intimate. Except that one...

from AtS 5x21 Power Play

I.

“SPIKE! In my office. Now!”

“Right. Just feel like humourin’ you.”

“I’ve had just about enough of you disrupting my...What? What are you doing?”

“Gettin’ comfortable. What’s it look like?”

“Well, stop it.”

“Embarrassin' you, am I?”

“Yes...no...oh, fuck it.”

“Oi! Get off me!”

“Uh uh, you play with fire, Spike, you’re gonna get burned.”

“Thought you couldn’t...”

“Spike, do you know how much you piss me off? Yeah, keep squirming...Yeah, like that...”

“Been awhile, just threw me, is all. Let’s give you a hand...”

“Oh fuck, my pants...”

“Well, well, look who’s Johnny Rocket?”

“My pants...”

II.

“Spike, what do you think you’re doing?”

“Comin’ up. What’s it look like?”

“You’re not getting on this elevator. It’s late and you’re very drunk.”

“Course I am. Move aside, Angel.”

“From the smell of things, you’ve gotten laid. Your new girlfriend wouldn’t let you stay over?”

“Can always find a place to kip. Not why I’m here. Could use a mate, is all.”

“We’re not friends, Spike.”

“No, but we’re somethin', aren’t we, Angel?”

“You could say that.”

“So am I comin’ up?”

“Yeah, c’mon, but don’t pull this on me tomorrow.”

“Fine, settled then. Won’t remember this tomorrow.”

III.

“Don’t think I’m goin’ to invite you in, Angel.”

“Look, I’m already in. Sucks to be dead, don’t it, Spike?”

“Lord, you’re in your cups.”

“What? I’m not allowed? You get shit-faced all the time. What makes you so special?”

“Other way 'round, I think. Get behind the wheel, did you?”

“Like you care.”

“Don’t. Need to sleep it off and you’re not doin’ it here.”

“Why not?”

“Look at my accommodations.”

“We’ve slept on smaller, you and I.”

“Angel, you don’t mean...”

“Will, please...”

“No, Da, don’t...”

“I’ll leave in the morning.”

“Alright then, ‘fore I change my mind.”

The End

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